Cavemen and other valuable conversation topics
Application: the act of putting something into operation.
There was a particularly hairy man at the pool one day…which was unfortunate. For earlier in the day, as fate would have it, my wife and then 6-year old son William had had a conversation about cavemen. [clouds forming] So when William’s gaze fell upon the particularly hairy man, he exclaimed, “Look mom, a caveman!” Wanting to crawl under a rock, my wife, reluctantly, looked in the direction of William’s outstretched arm and pointed finger. And there he stood. The particularly hairy man. [slight rolling of thunder] And before she can apologize to this mildly wounded soul, William delivers the coup de grace, “Hey man, I thought you guys were extinct?!” [full-blown storm] That was five years ago and at least three of us are still laughing. Possibly – doubtfully – a fourth. We’ll likely never know.
That’s the rare case in which a child hears something one time and applies it right away. That has to be an anomaly. It’s my experience that kids are masters of selective hearing. They’ll hear it when they want to hear it. And I also believe that most of us never really grow up. For that reason, we may need to hear things multiple times before it soaks in and becomes…applicable. For that reason, we may need to hear things multiple times before it soaks in and becomes…applicable. And while none can dispute the value of a good caveman conversation, there are other topics worthy of application as well. Your family’s approach to finances being one of them.
“Hold on, Billy. My kids are too young to understand money, where it comes from, or that it doesn’t grow on trees. That conversation would be, to use a phrase from your last post, ‘time misspent.’”
I hear what you’re saying, but you’re not teaching an economics class.
You’re just having a conversation.
Allow me to illustrate the point another way. How would you want your child to learn about the birds and the bees? Some kid in math class? Her friend’s older sister? ABC Family Channel? (As if there is such a thing.) Sounds ridiculous, doesn’t it? Well guess what. These conversations are likely taking place. Are yours? There are certain things kids just don’t have a natural acuity for and financial stewardship is one of them. But left to their own devices, they’ll figure it out – consequences be darned.
Consider how much pain you might be able to save them
if you apply what you know to be true and take ownership of the conversation.
News Flash: There are elements of our culture that are not family friendly, nor are they stalwarts of financial stewardship. One should not have to learn about debt by falling deeply into it. Just as one shouldn’t have to learn about gestation periods by having a baby. Kids – young and old – can be sponges. And sponges soak up whatever they’re exposed to. So, wring out your child, apply what you know to be true and have the conversation. Show your kids what your family values. Discuss why it’s important to give, to save, and live off the rest. Explain to them how debt can be dangerous. Model for them that life is better spent wanting than owing. Tell them that one’s quality of life doesn’t have to be tied to one’s standard of living. Show them there are consequences for the choices they make – that if you spend it here, you can’t spend it there. It doesn’t have to be a perfect conversation – just your conversation.
Apply what you know to be true. Have a conversation. It’s simple…so simple (say it with me) even a caveman could do it.
